Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Battle of the Mind

Have you ever experienced a battle for your mind? Or better, your words? I've been battling with myself over the words I use. It's hard not just saying what you feel is appropriate and right. That may not sound right because you have the freedom of speech. Which is all true and well, but you also need to take others into consideration when you speak. If you walk around slapping people in the face all day with the words you say, people will eventually stop talking to you because they are tired of getting beat down.

I have a thousand words running around in my head every day and no one to tell them to. Part of the reason I started this blog was so that I could dump some of them here. Only the hubby and I had a conversation recently about what qualifies as gossip and the fact that he wants nothing to do with the internet. I find that a hard concept to grasp...actually both of them. When does talking about a person in order to get the facts straight and determine the next type of engagement turn into gossiping. I think I find this concept hard because I don't like talking about people in front of them whether it be good or bad. I actually find I have a hard time talking in front of people on average. It is getting better but it's still a battle I challenge.

The other battle is how I allow words to affect me. After being mentally and emotionally abused for how many years, it's hard not to let someone's words sink me. I've grabbed onto "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do." - Luke 23:34 to help me battle this. It just doesn't always erase the words. The books I've been reading lately all surround the topic on how you must be careful of how you use your words because they can tear down as easily as they boost up. Words can also be connected to a powerful thought. I'm sure you've all had the experience where someone says a word or you hear it said and you are instantly somewhere else. Like reading Emotional Intelligence, when he started talking about the hippocampus I was instantly transferred to Meet the Robinsons.

These are the reasons why I haven't been writing on here as often as I would like to be. the power of my words and the effect words have on me stun me. I keep reading and I keep learning and eventually I will come again to the point where I am not conscious of who my words may be hitting and just praying that they are hitting the right person.