Thursday, July 14, 2011

Random thoughts

Sitting here feeling unfair and alone. Was wondering where it came from. And trying to occupy myself in hopes that my brain will tell itself to shut up. Have realized that my brain is my own worst enemy and that if I don't take control of it, it will take control of me and take me down into the well I fell into two years ago. Didn't realize until then just how deep and affected I was by the mental abuse from my first husband.

Need to start or join some kind of crusade to help these young women to realize that there is more to them than what that boy says about them or too them. They need to know that even if it feels like there are no other options out there, that there are. I didn't realize how many decent guys were out there until I had finally had enough of my ex. The decent guys won't let you know that they think you are the greatest girl they've ever met and cannot believe that you are with such a loser.

So, now I got distracted by the movie I am watching, The SwitchSeems like my mom is on a roll with these movies. She always sends me home with all the new movies that she's seen. I just watched How Do You Knowright before this one. It is the night of the girly movies. They have a similar topic...the best friend, the good friend that is the one that you cannot see because they are too close to you. That is the guy that we all want in the end. That best friend that we can't live without.

The reason that I am sitting here watching girly movies by myself is because my hubby went out for a guy's night. I think this is the second time in a year that he's done this. He's not a really social person. He's great in social situations, he just can't stand people on the whole. He's a former Marine that some days has issues with civilian life. If you know a former Marine, this is a common feeling among them.

So anyway, distracted again. The hubby is out hanging with his friends and I am feeling all alone. Shouldn't be because I know he's just right down the street. I have been hours away hanging with my friends and I bet he never felt this way. May he did. Never asked him. I should be excited that he's hanging out with his friends, right? I am.

Maybe it's because we had such a great night talking last night and it's been a long time since we've had such a nice conversation where one or the other didn't say something that the other heard wrong. We both tend to have that skill when we talk to each other. So those great conversations just leave you wanting more. maybe we'll have some more this weekend because we're going back to my hometown for the weekend. Having an old fashioned family get-together. As well as the world's largest one day outdoor fish fry. Yes, you read that right. Go and check it out. Living with it every year became old hat. Moving away and having a chance to miss really miss it. Terrific parade and marathon in the morning. Car show, craft show, and bands all day long. They had a ferris wheel on the bluff over looking the lake last year. I have a phobia of ferris wheels but the hubby took the monkeys on it. The most awesome fish fry I have had (gotta go to the VFW tent, just my preference). And then the night ends with a fantastic fire works show. It's better than the fourth of July fireworks.

So...thanks for listening to my ramblings. I feel better now. Hope ya'll enjoyed it. I'm sure there will be more randomness coming out of me in the future. Have a fantastic night everyone.